These next cupple of weeks are going tobe hell... I can't believe I'm acctaully going through with this. I love the boy and im willing to try it. I just want things better. I'm tired of how things are with us. I love it when im with him i feel completebut i can't stand it when we fight and im like to the point i just want to say fuck it all....but not like that....like pretend nothing he does ever bothers me. Thats what im about to have to do....

The Plan

The next copple of weeks, or how ever long it takes, I'm not talking to david. Not calling him no nothing. I only can see him at school.

My Fears

I have a feeling that it;s not going to work, And im going to get pushed out of his life. well i don't have a feeling its going to happen thats what im afraid is going to happen.  Im afraid I'm going to lose him all together. I would hate that. Im afraid he's going to talk to kt and megan all the time and end up liking one of them. Kt is now single, and Megan kind of likes him. I'm so scared


i don't want to do this anymore!!
I love daivd so much, im willing to do what it takes. I need to get myself emotionally stable. I need to "controll my emotions" a.k.a no crying! Im going to try...

Love and Kisses
Lisa.